A Case for the Mondays

Seriously, grandma, I get it.
Seriously, grandma, I get it.

“Ah…Monday.” We’ve all heard it a million times, right? And don’t act like you don’t know what context I mean that in: this is GG, I’m not talking about the time in kindergarten when we learned what all the days of the week are – I’m talking about the bane of your coworkers’ collective existence. Monday. Fuckin’ Monday. MONDAY. A day so universally hated everyone comments on it, including/especially the media. From Office Space to Garfield and everywhere in between, I don’t think I’m overstating anything when I say Monday is literally the worst thing to ever happen in human history even if you combined all of the bad things into one super bad thing.

(By the way, why does Garfield hate Mondays so much? What is he so happy about during the weekend that Monday takes away from him? He doesn’t have a job, his day-to-day responsibilities are basically limited to eating lasagna and mocking Jon…his Mondays sound pretty fuckin’ cool if you ask me.)

(Oh, and one more quick detour while I’m at it [I know, sorry, I’m all over the place today]: If you haven’t ever seen Lasagna Cat or Garfield Minus Garfield, do yourself a favor and check out both. They’re both excellent, excellent reimaginations of Garfield. Totally worth your time.)

Monday though, you guys, seriously though: it’s the worst right? Oh wait a second: Nope. Turns out you’re just lazy and lame and looking for any reason you can find to complain. Most people thrive on complaining (but, uh, not ST and I, that would be ridiculous) – Monday is easily the second-best day of the week, and if anything it’s doing you a FAVOR by filling the “I need to complain about something” void in your life.

Continue reading “A Case for the Mondays”

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A Case for the Mondays

I Just Finished a Conference Call That Lasted 14 Minutes…

Here’s a quick breakdown of how that time was spent:

 

  • 6 minutes (43%): Waiting for people to jump onto the call and recapping the names of everyone who had joined thus far
  • 3 minutes (21%): Asking if there was any update on the data validation process since late last night (Note: The relevant parties with the answers to this question weren’t on the call)
  • 1 minute (7%): Expressing that we really need an update on that validation process
  • 4 minutes (29%): Painstakingly asking the entire group if they thought it was OK to end the call early while we wait for news on the validation process and planning another follow-up call once we know more

 

How is it possible to make 14 minutes feel so much like 14 days? With the exception of watching this video seven straight times or reading through our post history, is there any less productive way to spend 14 minutes? The real-life equivalent of this would be sitting down to make a sandwich and taking meticulous inventory of all your ingredients, expressing the plan to make a sandwich, and then setting up a second trip to the kitchen later to make the sandwich per the previously discussed plan. If people acted in real life like they do on conference calls, literally nothing would ever get done.

Workin’ hard or hardly workin’?!

 

–jsg

I Just Finished a Conference Call That Lasted 14 Minutes…